


563 Steps

by Corneille (Minatu)



Category: Free!
Genre: Almost Sex, Awkward First Times, M/M, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 06:33:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1256365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Minatu/pseuds/Corneille
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nagisa bothers Rei. He gets on Rei's nerves, and Rei has found himself in the strangest form of affection for his not-quite-a-friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	563 Steps

Calculations. Methodology. Mathematical procedures. All of it is terribly important, but more than that, there is something else there. Something that is constantly tugging at my arm and trying to grab my attention to the best of its ability, and I’m not really sure why it’s there, or why it’s so interested in taking my attention away from the important things, but it persists.

Strangely enough, it’s not all that annoying though. I don’t know why it isn’t, but its tenacious personality is starting to seem just a little bit... _cute_. I can’t believe I even thought that. It’s awful. This... this _person_ is not worthy of my attention! He’s not beautiful! Or all that smart! Or interested in math!

_Haru-chan_... Why do I feel so irritated? He mentions this other person, and I just can’t _stand_ it. I don’t even know why I can’t. Obviously it makes no sense for a person I don’t even know to make me angry, but apparently they are. And this “Haru-chan” is doing quite the good job at irritating me out of my own mind. I can’t believe this.

“Rei-chan!!” he yells in my ear. I can’t stand it, “Why are you ignoring me?” Now there are tears in his eyes and he’s pouting. He knows that I’m weak to his tears, but today, I am prepared. He will not break down my iron defenses. We are not quite anything yet, so quit bothering me, _seriously_. My defense breaks when I hear a whimper. How does he get under my skin?

“What is it?” I ask, slowly in a calm voice. I don’t want to sound impatient, but I’m sure that I do. He pouts slightly, his pink coloured eyes still full of fresh tears. I feel a little bit bad about it, and I can barely believe that he can even make me feel such emotions, such as remorse. It just seemed so improbable.

“You didn’t hear a word of what I said, did you?” he asks me, his fists firmly gripped near to his shoulders. He keeps a small frown on his face, and he seriously looks almost... That thought had to be deleted promptly. I push my glasses up swiftly.

“Of course not,” I respond, “It did not seem important, so I did not dedicate it to memory.” He looks at me in slight horror, but mostly disbelief. He wants me to think everything he says is important, I figure.

“Rei-channn,” he whines in a cutesy voice, and I do my best to not linger on the sound of his voice in that moment. He really does just get under my skin. It’s very troublesome.

“What?” I respond quickly. irritation most definitely colouring my voice this time. I look over at him, and he grabs my glasses. I only manage to catch him sticking out his tongue before my vision goes blurry.

“Are you listening now?” he says with a playful intonation. I growl, and he giggles in response.

“Give my glasses back,” I tell him with a lowly voice. He laughs even more.

“You’re gonna have to catch me, Rei-chan!” he giggles in an almost sing-song voice, and I almost want to strangle him, but of course, I do not. Instead, I lumber after him in a tragically ungraceful manner. This is due to the fact that I cannot see a thing, however. I can’t believe him at the moment.

When I finally grab him, I have his back pressed to my chest as I lean over him and take my glasses back. Once I can see again, I see his blushing face gazing up at me, lips parted slightly, and my heart starts pounding in my chest.

“Na...” my voice seems to have left me. Then he reaches up and pulls me into a kiss, and I allow him, like the many times I had before. A simple thing that “happens” between us sometimes, but I always pretend that it doesn’t, but he is keen on reminding me consistently.

His soft pants warm my lips when I lift away slightly, but he is still gripping onto the front of my shirt. His eyes are half-lidded, and I cannot help myself, seeing him this way. I lean back down, recapturing his lips in mine. This time, the kiss is more passionate. I lick and nip at his lower lip until he moans into me. I grip his lower back tightly. He often complains of how I never run out of breath, and I merely smile, waiting for the next one.

Sometimes I can tell he wants more than just kissing, and that frightens me a little. I have never partaken in such things, and oftentimes, we kiss because it’s just the two of us in the train station. It never advances past that, but lately, he’s been sliding his hands under my shirt, and I quite simply do not know what to do. I don’t want to stop kissing him, and it does feel _good_ the way he touches me... but I fear that he will not be satisfied with just that for long. He doesn’t seem like much of the type to assert himself, but he is. He just has a round-abouts way of asserting himself, and I am kind of turned on by that part of him.

But it also scares me.

“Rei-chan,” he says softly. He’s noticed that I’ve drifted off into thought again. I look over at him, and he’s smiling, ever so slightly, and really, it’s a nice smile. I really like his smile. He scoots closer to me, and electricity shoots up through me as our knees touch. He has a very different look in his eyes today...

“Will you come over to my house today?” he asks with the tiniest of smiles. I freeze. I do not have words in me, not for this question. What if... What if he wants to...? He smiles reassuringly at me, and I find that I can’t say no, and so, I say “okay”. He gives me a look of pure glee and excitement, and I can only give him a slight, nervous one. I never knew something could be so terrifying to me before.

I could barely keep out of my thoughts, no matter how many times he tried to pull me out of them.

In his room, he holds my hand carefully in his, intertwining our fingers. His mother is in the kitchen cooking. She has some music playing loudly, and we could hear it all the way in his room. His beautiful eyes glitter as he crawls over to me and onto my lap. Quietly, he presses a kiss to my lips.

My thoughts left me then.

I began to focus solely on kissing him. The soft noises that he makes, encourage me to keep going. Suddenly, I am no longer wearing my shirt. I do not even remember taking it off. He stares into my eyes, his hands caressing every muscle on my upper body as he has done thousands of times before. His fascination with my body embarrasses me although we have seen each other half naked many times.

“Nagisa...” I say, slowly and softly. His eyes flick up to mine, and he smiles. The warmth of his eyes fills my soul and disperses all of my worries. He presses a kiss to my neck, sloppily. A surprised noise escapes me that was foreign to me before this time. He smiles against my skin as he moves down, his fingers slipping into my pants. Immediately, I grab his wrists stopping him. His mother’s voice erupts into the house. She’s singing along to a song now.

“Your mother...” I protest weakly. He wiggles his fingers in spite of me, eliciting a low moan from my lips. Yet another foreign noise. The feather light touches of his fingers did a number on me. He led me slowly through it, and it was messy.

When he entered me, it was painful. He apologises profusely, but it doesn’t really make it any better. We end up stopping there. After we redressed, he hugs me and apologises one thousand times, I counted every single one, quietly, in my head. He does not know that I counted. I think I love him even so.

His mother seems to like me. They are very similar. He is right, she didn’t seem to hear a thing. Not even my shouting for him to stop. I think I had cried a little. He seems to still feel a little bad about it. He holds my hand beneath the table, and I realise I do love him, but now is not the time to tell him. I smile at him. It’s a small smile, but a smile nonetheless.

I leave a little after it grows dark outside. I live nearby, so it isn’t really a big deal, and I think about how I would like to go over again. I like spending time with him and his mother. I count the steps it takes to get to my house from his. _563_... it’s my favourite number now. It’s a small number, and an important one to me.

Walking is a little weird, but I do my best to readjust to the slight pain that I feel, and hide it as well as I can. He notices anyway. I can tell by the crestfallen look on his face. I want to say that he doesn’t have to apologise so much, but I do not think he would listen anyway. Instead, I kiss him quickly on the forehead and walk away before anyone notices. I can feel his smile from a mile away.

I wonder what he is thinking about when we’re in class. Perhaps he’s sleeping. He always needs my help when it’s time for exams. I wonder how long that will last though. We are only in high school. I wonder if we’ll drift apart... I don’t really want that. Mostly because I am almost positive that I am in love with him, but I am doing my best to make sure that I am 100% sure of this before I tell him this. I feel that it is very important that he knows exactly how serious I am about this. I end up thinking about this almost all day and find that my notes are not as detailed as they usually are.

I suddenly find myself plagued by the thought of wanting to take him out on a date. It is an embarrassing thought, since two guys rarely go out together on _actual_ dates, like a girl and boy would, but I want to. So I set about asking him, which proved a difficult enough task on its own. I notice that we are rarely alone together, at least, not until we are at the station, which is where I ended up asking him.

“Really?” he asks me, a big grin gracing his features. I nod slightly. He wraps me in my arms. It’s our first date, and I believe I am very excited. I am tempted to kiss him, but I do not as the train is pulling in.

.

We take back roads on our date so that we can hold hands. It’s a nice feeling, holding hands. I had been afraid once that our hands might not fit together and it might be a little painful to actually hold hands, but that did not seem to be the case. Our hands fit together quite nicely.

I am very sure that I love him. Still, I keep this information to myself. I am still a little scared.

We eat in a little diner that has a homely feel to it. The waitress is a plump, smiling lady. He likes talking to her a lot. She laughs a lot too. It’s kind of nice. I am not very talkative anyway. I think it is good for him to have someone to chat away with sometimes. Though I would prefer he pay more attention to me... I am quick to return his attention to me.

At the end of our date, I stop him in front of his house. I am a little nervous, but this is very important to me, so I cannot let him go until I finally tell him.

“I...” the first word leaves me so hesitantly. I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. I close my eyes, and the confidence finally finds me, “I love you.” When I open my eyes, I see his smiling face, but there are tears in his eyes. For a moment, I am confused, but he is quick to explain.

“I love you too,” he says, swiping at his tears, “...I’m so happy; I’m crying.” I smile at him, and he hugs me tightly.

I am happy. I never really knew I wasn’t until I met him. He is precious to me, so precious, and no words could ever explain how an annoyance becomes a love.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed!


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